Appreciate?

It's weird that these few days, I have been meeting what we call "仇人" (enemy).  Haha... a friend was talking about this person whom everyone will associates with me whenever anyone talks about her.  And since our 'common friends' were never around me, I never talk about her.  She just like a smoke, evaporated in the air, i.e. never exist in my life anymore.  What have she done? Let's not talk about it.  One of two do know what she did but as usual, I will not talk about it or to clarify with anyone what she did or whether I did or she did the right things, etc.  After all, that's about it... I have 'erased' her from my life completely.  The best part is, we do not lives in the same town and if we do met each other, we will just walked past each other.  It was done twice for the past 3  years.  Once, dad and I went to church and parked next to her car.  Dad got down from the car and started to chat with her and I just walked straight without even look at her in her eyes at all. Second time, it happen 2 days ago in 1 Borneo Hypermall.  We went past each other shoulder to shoulder and none of us seeing each other nor greet one another.  Yeah, I can be that extreme.  That's right.  Does it hurt? It was badly and deeply hurt when things went really wrong and that she couldn't be considerate at all.  She did it, and so, delete was the button she forced me to press.  I did after everyone including my sister in law told me, she's a bit too much.  Thanks to SJ for being helpful to become the middle person to sort things out.  I still believe until today, SJ took out her own money and paid me instead.  Thanks.  I really appreciate that.
Weird, I went to the hospital today... yes, again! Damn... from another workshop to another one.  Looks like lots of parts need to get repair. hahahahaha... well, now I have more and more scanning and examinations to do..... but instead of upset or sadness, the dr seems to be quite shock to find out I was rather calm and still can joke and he look at my referral letter and am convinced that I am very well with my depression. With a few examinations, well.... he suspected something just like the rest did.  I was reluctant to go back to the hospital again and again seriously... but in a way, i am FORCED to because it disturbed me from working... arrgggh! Anyway, when I got down from 8th floor after 2 hours of examination, the lift stopped at floor 6 and DY was standing outside the lift waiting to come in.  She was shock to find me inside the lift.  I seriously have no mood to talk to a soul after what the dr told me, and I don't even have a mood to talk to HER in particular.  I don't want more news spread around which becomes gossips or that I am being controlled by evil, etc. etc.  So, yeah... I didn't even want to talk to her at all.
These few days, I have been thinking... what if I met one of them in the street? How should I face it? Now... I know... it doesn't hurt anymore.  They are already OUT OF my life for good.  I don't need to care for anyone anymore nor I want to be care for anymore.  Those who choose to left me alone during the hardest moment in my life... I have pressed the delete button and deleted them from my life/dictionary already.
Worse still, Mel brought IC to church on Sunday... hahaha.. interestingly, yeah, 3 persons on 3 days... and none hurts at all. I feel good.. hahahahahaha... so, I can tell my dad now... "I did it, Dad! I did it!".
They have thought too much about me relying on friends too much.  That's the last thing I was trying to do.  I was finding support .... and all I can say was, I did found a few.  The greatest support, not financially, not to be included for EVERYTHING, no need to be in the same church, but still encouraging me, no need to contact me every single day, etc.  but being themselves and treated me the same like things never gone wrong after all that happen.  That's what I need the most.  Being themselves and treating me the same as before. I seriously thank God for Lisa Kong and Delson Ong.  You 2 are just great!  Thank you! Everyone else has left except you 2.  I really appreciate you both.

- Appreciate? -