My priest preached about Love this morning in the English service. Well, it's the famous bible scriptures in 1 Corinthian that he was preaching about. Strictly speaking, I almost fall asleep while listening. Love? It's such a huge topic. It's a topic everyone would like to have, but not everyone who has received. I certainly being overwhelmed by it. I used to love every single people I met. I don't choose who to love and who not to love. But people has turned my love to think I have intention behind my love. More so, people misunderstood me. People has turned my love to hatred. After being rejected completely, of me and/or my love or whatever they think it is.... I have ceased to love anyone anymore.
I used to love others more than myself. But for the first few years, I have started not to love anyone else, but myself. However, what my priest preached this morning about not to love himself first but love others, has somehow completely contrary to my believe. hahahahahaha....
Love others? Why? And for the whole day, I have been wondering why God wants to love all the sinners instead of Himself. By loving sinners and all, He got hurt .... badly. Even have to give away His only Son, Jesus. Does it worth it? Why love others? Even caring for others, I have given up. I know my clients have great chance to win and I know I can help him to win the case, but when he bag me for paying me by instalment and/or later, I don't give a damn anymore. I don't bother much anyway if they are going to get what they want or deserve. It's time to think about myself an myself ONLY.
I used to love and care for others a lot , lot more than loving and caring for myself. But not these days. If I saw someone who was hit by a car right in front of me, all I do now a day is probably just walk away and have no more feelings about pain and suffering anymore. If someone is calling me in desperation for RM1.00, I will ask him/her to go 'earn' it. I won't give a damn. Has my heart gets harden? I guess I NEED to, ... in order to protect myself, in order not to be taken granted for, in order not be hurt by others anymore.
I wonder has God heart got harden and refuse to love us one day? hahahaha..... if He does, we are doomed. If He doesn't .. that just because He is God. and all I can say is, I am not God. hehe... so, to love others?
Hmm.... not for me anymore.... it's for those who always love themselves.
- Love ... -
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Saturday, April 27, 2013
I have a problem....
It's an obvious problem. People keep asking if I feel bored with being alone. Problem is, I don't. In fact, I get very annoyed having needs to cope with people around. Why is that a problem? Because that will only means, I can't get along with ANYONE, EVERYONE...... and it really means, I won't have businesses because I don't go for marketing (meeting people). It's a serious problem. I only feel comfortable with people I 'choose' to be with, selected people. In fact, I have been 'provoking' many people recently until I also think i have a serious problem.....
haiz.... or may be it's just this season? haiz... it's so hard to cope with my emotion these days....
- I have a problem ...-
haiz.... or may be it's just this season? haiz... it's so hard to cope with my emotion these days....
- I have a problem ...-
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Smart Landlord!
Over the years, I keep having clients who came in and asked me how they can chase their tenant out from their premises. Condition is always the tenant has failed to pay the landlord rental for MONTHS, if not YEARS. Their refusal to pay, and refusal to move out has caused most landlord heaving sleepless nights. What more, if they are from oversea.
Over the years, the most who came to and complained about are those who have rented their place to Korean. Yes. I am having a difficult time with Korean who stays above me either. They tend to have a habits to keep moving their tables and chairs I suppose.... anyway, that's not what I want to talk about it. I just wanted to tell you how hard it is to claim your rental and/or property back if you are renting your property to them.
9 out of 10 of them won't pay their rental at the end of their tenancy period. It is impossible to issue a Letter of Demand to them as their address given mostly OUT OF JURISDICTION. And if you want them to move out, try wait for a year or two. If you want to get a court order for their removal, it is as good as IMPOSSIBLE. So, be smart. Try to either get a FULL payment for the whole tenancy period from them or ... rent it to someone else, even thought they offer a better rental.
If you think you can get them out from the premises after the end of the tenancy period, dream on. First, you won't be able to locate them. Secondly, they whole place is in mess. Thirdly, all your utilities Bills might not be fully settled (at least a few months' outstanding).
No. Don't get me wrong. I didn't say this because I am bother by one now. I am saying because that's FACT!
Do you need all these hassles? If you do, you can still consider renting your place for them. After all, they always agree to pay a higher rental. But trust me, most of them moves out without paying rental for months without even you notice. So, try to be smart.
- Smart Landlord! -
Over the years, the most who came to and complained about are those who have rented their place to Korean. Yes. I am having a difficult time with Korean who stays above me either. They tend to have a habits to keep moving their tables and chairs I suppose.... anyway, that's not what I want to talk about it. I just wanted to tell you how hard it is to claim your rental and/or property back if you are renting your property to them.
9 out of 10 of them won't pay their rental at the end of their tenancy period. It is impossible to issue a Letter of Demand to them as their address given mostly OUT OF JURISDICTION. And if you want them to move out, try wait for a year or two. If you want to get a court order for their removal, it is as good as IMPOSSIBLE. So, be smart. Try to either get a FULL payment for the whole tenancy period from them or ... rent it to someone else, even thought they offer a better rental.
If you think you can get them out from the premises after the end of the tenancy period, dream on. First, you won't be able to locate them. Secondly, they whole place is in mess. Thirdly, all your utilities Bills might not be fully settled (at least a few months' outstanding).
No. Don't get me wrong. I didn't say this because I am bother by one now. I am saying because that's FACT!
Do you need all these hassles? If you do, you can still consider renting your place for them. After all, they always agree to pay a higher rental. But trust me, most of them moves out without paying rental for months without even you notice. So, try to be smart.
- Smart Landlord! -
Monday, April 22, 2013
Future planning...
It has been a 2 crazy weeks of the technology havoc... this week, it is about finances. hahaha... without realising, most of the files are closing and money are going out one by one.... and luckily, when the bank called, I was prompted (by holy spirit) to check the account to see if there's sufficient fund as I have taken most of it and place it in Fixed deposit instead. Low and behold, it wasn't. hahahahahaa.... so, i have to go to the Bank to withdraw 2 FD... hahaha.... so funny! Oh well, just because I need to visit the Bank, I went to my own branch to meet a few bankers and trying to gets their support for my application as Bank Panel. May be after all, I need to expand a bit. Even thought I am survived with a few litigation files, however, I guess... I do need to plan ahead for now, especially when I have the time to do all the application. Speaking of application, I forgot to get my Commissioners for Oath application done up with, YET. So, yes... guess that's what I need.
Just when I am feeling so worry about future due to the quietness.... everyone just told me not to because things will definitely be better after election. I hope so really.... because clients are having difficult paying me recently. That's the worries.
- Future planning -
Just when I am feeling so worry about future due to the quietness.... everyone just told me not to because things will definitely be better after election. I hope so really.... because clients are having difficult paying me recently. That's the worries.
- Future planning -
Friday, April 19, 2013
Reminded!
These few days, I am feeling a bit down... and I have been trying very hard to control my emotions. Generally, not to shout at people or not to get so frustrated with certain conversation. Some just rub on of course that made me feels so lazy and xian to talk to them. Not that they don't understand what I went through for the past few weeks, but they have also add on to the pain by 'playing' around, let's not mention about being comforting, etc. I guess these days, no one does that anymore. hahaha....
I am seriously worry about a childhood friend who is going through a postnatal depression. The way she described her situation gave me an impression that it's really bad. She loves darkness, being in the bed without getting up, etc. Just like those first few weeks that went through. Hell like life. Worse for her was that she has a HUMAN, baby to take care... and i was only having cases and works, of course later with dad's condition, Human do come in... just that i was controlled by medicine then, so i was ok. But for her, she's on her first few weeks. Hence I am worry. Worry for her, worry for her baby... Thank God her husband has just resigned and taking care of the baby and her at the moment. Otherwise, I really don't know how she is going to handle it. Can't count on her parents as her mom is having cancer and her dad is taking care of her mom. Poor thing... i just can't bear not to try talk to her and encourage her a bit these few days.... hearing her side of the story and trying to comforts her, asked her not to blame herself for things she can't even control of, herself. I guess not many people understand what she is going through. I do.
I just finish watching the last episode of this HK series and the main actress finally killed herself. I really praise the Director in this HK series for showing the actual situation of 'rather giving up' than handling the sickness. One of the Senior Dr told her, it needs lots of efforts to lives. I guess she just suffered too much at the same time and she just feeling tired and wanted to give up. When I was watching the episode, i was brought back to those time.... where I can't control myself (luckily i didn't kill someone - and it needs lot of efforts to don't let myself out of the room), I lost myself, I didn't have support, I have too many things happen at the same time. My church and its members fails me and i lost balance for a while wondering why even God's people and leaders can be so bad to a christian like me. Yes. I was wrong to put trust on the Church rather than God. I didn't lost God, but church... yes. Definitely! For a Priest who ill-treated their staff/partners in work, goodness.. i am sure you can imagine how much 'imbalance' i received those days.... from all these, I am reminded of those darkest moment in my life. The worse was, I was all alone by myself every single day.... (even though all those who cares oversea did send their encouragement, emails, comforts to me occasionally - i do remember who you are. I did recorded it. Some even send their money to my account even with TT services charges, knowing that I wasn't able to work at all). But i can assure you, none is from Chris Church, the church I have been around for 5 years. They rather see me dead by now... haha...
Oh well, it really takes a lot of efforts to lives to today!!! God obviously has upon my request, sent Yien Loong back to Sabah for 2 years, just to help me out of the sickness and to sort out my firm. I can never thought of her coming back... her family was so supportive and always takes me as one of her family member. I always feel so welcome and comfortable knowing I do have them around.
Now that she is leaving.... I know it's God who says, I am capable now to moves on by myself. I really thank God for her, for her obedient in God's plan. In her wonderful support. A great old friend I will always love.
It's easier to kill myself then during the darkest moment. It's too, easier for one to sins rather than not to. Doing a right thing is always not easy. I have been trying to be 'godly' lawyer... but it is so hard too to survive. I know I will goes bankrupt soon if I continue to keep it this way, without corruption. Unless, God shows His mercy and grace of course!!!
So, yes, ... I am praying for mercy and grace.
- Reminded! -
I am seriously worry about a childhood friend who is going through a postnatal depression. The way she described her situation gave me an impression that it's really bad. She loves darkness, being in the bed without getting up, etc. Just like those first few weeks that went through. Hell like life. Worse for her was that she has a HUMAN, baby to take care... and i was only having cases and works, of course later with dad's condition, Human do come in... just that i was controlled by medicine then, so i was ok. But for her, she's on her first few weeks. Hence I am worry. Worry for her, worry for her baby... Thank God her husband has just resigned and taking care of the baby and her at the moment. Otherwise, I really don't know how she is going to handle it. Can't count on her parents as her mom is having cancer and her dad is taking care of her mom. Poor thing... i just can't bear not to try talk to her and encourage her a bit these few days.... hearing her side of the story and trying to comforts her, asked her not to blame herself for things she can't even control of, herself. I guess not many people understand what she is going through. I do.
I just finish watching the last episode of this HK series and the main actress finally killed herself. I really praise the Director in this HK series for showing the actual situation of 'rather giving up' than handling the sickness. One of the Senior Dr told her, it needs lots of efforts to lives. I guess she just suffered too much at the same time and she just feeling tired and wanted to give up. When I was watching the episode, i was brought back to those time.... where I can't control myself (luckily i didn't kill someone - and it needs lot of efforts to don't let myself out of the room), I lost myself, I didn't have support, I have too many things happen at the same time. My church and its members fails me and i lost balance for a while wondering why even God's people and leaders can be so bad to a christian like me. Yes. I was wrong to put trust on the Church rather than God. I didn't lost God, but church... yes. Definitely! For a Priest who ill-treated their staff/partners in work, goodness.. i am sure you can imagine how much 'imbalance' i received those days.... from all these, I am reminded of those darkest moment in my life. The worse was, I was all alone by myself every single day.... (even though all those who cares oversea did send their encouragement, emails, comforts to me occasionally - i do remember who you are. I did recorded it. Some even send their money to my account even with TT services charges, knowing that I wasn't able to work at all). But i can assure you, none is from Chris Church, the church I have been around for 5 years. They rather see me dead by now... haha...
Oh well, it really takes a lot of efforts to lives to today!!! God obviously has upon my request, sent Yien Loong back to Sabah for 2 years, just to help me out of the sickness and to sort out my firm. I can never thought of her coming back... her family was so supportive and always takes me as one of her family member. I always feel so welcome and comfortable knowing I do have them around.
Now that she is leaving.... I know it's God who says, I am capable now to moves on by myself. I really thank God for her, for her obedient in God's plan. In her wonderful support. A great old friend I will always love.
It's easier to kill myself then during the darkest moment. It's too, easier for one to sins rather than not to. Doing a right thing is always not easy. I have been trying to be 'godly' lawyer... but it is so hard too to survive. I know I will goes bankrupt soon if I continue to keep it this way, without corruption. Unless, God shows His mercy and grace of course!!!
So, yes, ... I am praying for mercy and grace.
- Reminded! -
Thursday, April 18, 2013
MacBook Air
My first experience of an MacBook Air... indeed, it is not my first Apple product as I used to have a ipod touch everywhere I go including the gym and airport. Was even at the phrase where I can't even lives without one. I have however, never gotten the gut to buy one because I am afraid that it won't serve my purpose, i.e. sorting out works.
Who knows, it has been a technology havoc for me for the past 2 weeks and I ended up got this as 'supplementary' to ease the heavy workload I have at work after both my Toshiba and recent bought Sony were not fit for used. Remember some time last week, I was shouting from my room not knowing I have a client downstairs... well, with the frustration of not having office's electric supply was down for at least 4 days, telephone was down for at least 7 days (that's mean people keep calling my personal handphone), then with the internet problem, printers problem... you name it. It's just a pretty awful 2 weeks.
More so, with more and more things piling up on my table and with the resignation of 2 staffs and new staff. I was quite lost. But it is proven that, I am still in sound mind and stress and pressure are under control. Still keeping everything positive and not simply purchasing any laptop. Of course, I do needs people around to make things well. At least i consulted a few people, taking more steps for research, etc. Then only after 5 days living without one, and stressed out with it, then I decided to get a MacBook Air.
Many says the Mac is not very user friendly. It is not because it's not what we 'usually' use. With my kind of ability, I somehow get used to it within hours. Even though I am still new to it. But, i am picking it up and at least it has been solving much of my works already. I won't say it is a perfect piece of gadget, but at least, it has served the purpose for these few days... at least until I get my Sony back from the service centre.
I have learned many things over the last few years. I know nothing is within my control. Not my health, not my life, not my career, not my accounts, nothing..... Everything I have is given to me by grace.... from God. For the sake of RM4K and I lost a few thousands and a few potential clients... is that worth it? I was asking..... and I am quite sure you do have the answer for it too. Seriously, an unplanned 4k is killing.... and it means, CREDIT. But not that I have choice for now as I have deadline to meet and I have clients that's waiting for their works to be done...
Seriously, I am glad at least there's something I can use immediately from purchase.
i love my new gadget. That's what I have been telling myself every day. hahaha....
- MacBook Air -
Who knows, it has been a technology havoc for me for the past 2 weeks and I ended up got this as 'supplementary' to ease the heavy workload I have at work after both my Toshiba and recent bought Sony were not fit for used. Remember some time last week, I was shouting from my room not knowing I have a client downstairs... well, with the frustration of not having office's electric supply was down for at least 4 days, telephone was down for at least 7 days (that's mean people keep calling my personal handphone), then with the internet problem, printers problem... you name it. It's just a pretty awful 2 weeks.
More so, with more and more things piling up on my table and with the resignation of 2 staffs and new staff. I was quite lost. But it is proven that, I am still in sound mind and stress and pressure are under control. Still keeping everything positive and not simply purchasing any laptop. Of course, I do needs people around to make things well. At least i consulted a few people, taking more steps for research, etc. Then only after 5 days living without one, and stressed out with it, then I decided to get a MacBook Air.
Many says the Mac is not very user friendly. It is not because it's not what we 'usually' use. With my kind of ability, I somehow get used to it within hours. Even though I am still new to it. But, i am picking it up and at least it has been solving much of my works already. I won't say it is a perfect piece of gadget, but at least, it has served the purpose for these few days... at least until I get my Sony back from the service centre.
I have learned many things over the last few years. I know nothing is within my control. Not my health, not my life, not my career, not my accounts, nothing..... Everything I have is given to me by grace.... from God. For the sake of RM4K and I lost a few thousands and a few potential clients... is that worth it? I was asking..... and I am quite sure you do have the answer for it too. Seriously, an unplanned 4k is killing.... and it means, CREDIT. But not that I have choice for now as I have deadline to meet and I have clients that's waiting for their works to be done...
Seriously, I am glad at least there's something I can use immediately from purchase.
i love my new gadget. That's what I have been telling myself every day. hahaha....
- MacBook Air -
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Independent?
I met with a well known architect and developer recently and I went to him and say hi to him....and he shakes my hand and said "you are always so independent!". He has known me since i was young... and I am sure everyone is surprise that I have never asked them for help in my business ventures. I never requested them to help me up as a developer nor uses my parent's fame and name to gain more businesses. Guess that's the main reason why I am not back in Tawau and started my own firm there. I know many will give me businesses if I do, but is that what I want?
No. I am very sure that I don't after the last incidents with my relatives' cases. Those kind of pressures.... is the last thing I want. I don't like to bring shame to my parents too... as I have always been (at least that's what I think)... and certainly do not want my parents to endure an extra pressure from protecting me or .... defending me, whichever applies. hahaha....
Being in a place where not many knows me.... as a young lawyer, I guess that's what I need. Making every mistakes, trying every efforts... to make my own money, lives my own life, enduring the necessary suffering and pains and pressures, to take one step at a time... to grow...and to become an experienced lawyer. It is expected that many will complain, many will dislike the way I handle things or even the way i speaks... but that's me...
I am trying very hard to stay 'sane' due to the above. Yes. People still help when i needed or cried for help. Clients still come back despite being scolded by me. Some left, as expected. But that's how I 'filter' my clients.
Being independent? I guess in my situation, it is by force. I don't choose it. I just happen to be the only bloody lawyer who is not smart enough and without any family member who is lawyer who can give me full support. Unlike most of the lawyer who is rich and whose parents are in businesses. I don't. But I am not giving up. I will never give up. That's what i call, being independent.
- Independent? -
No. I am very sure that I don't after the last incidents with my relatives' cases. Those kind of pressures.... is the last thing I want. I don't like to bring shame to my parents too... as I have always been (at least that's what I think)... and certainly do not want my parents to endure an extra pressure from protecting me or .... defending me, whichever applies. hahaha....
Being in a place where not many knows me.... as a young lawyer, I guess that's what I need. Making every mistakes, trying every efforts... to make my own money, lives my own life, enduring the necessary suffering and pains and pressures, to take one step at a time... to grow...and to become an experienced lawyer. It is expected that many will complain, many will dislike the way I handle things or even the way i speaks... but that's me...
I am trying very hard to stay 'sane' due to the above. Yes. People still help when i needed or cried for help. Clients still come back despite being scolded by me. Some left, as expected. But that's how I 'filter' my clients.
Being independent? I guess in my situation, it is by force. I don't choose it. I just happen to be the only bloody lawyer who is not smart enough and without any family member who is lawyer who can give me full support. Unlike most of the lawyer who is rich and whose parents are in businesses. I don't. But I am not giving up. I will never give up. That's what i call, being independent.
- Independent? -
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
To be or not to be...
For the past few months, many came and asked me the same questions. Firstly, why am I still using "Kenneth Thien & Associates". Secondly, why am I not applying to be Bank panel. Some are lawyers, some are not. To be honest, I have no answer for that. I am just pure lazy to put on effort to get the firm name changed I guess. Whenever I thought of getting the new firm's envelopes, letterhead, signboards, receipt books and account name changed, printed, sorted out... I just don't feel good about it. Further more, I seriously do not know how much things need to be done since the firm name is already known by bankers now, etc. So, if you ask me if I am establishing my name or Kenneth Thien's name at the moment, I seriously have no idea. As far as I know, lawyers and court clerks who saw me, they know I am Lin Pei San from Kenneth Thien & Associates. But when my nephew told me he wants to be a lawyer one day....I am now having second thoughts... May be it is really better to put on Lin & Partners? or Lin & Associates? hahaha....
For the second question of why am I not wanting to be bank's penal lawyer? Hmm... good question. Again, it's another that needs lots of efforts and staffs to be around and past year's experiences told me, I can't cope with both side and so, in order to be 'good lawyer' and 'ethical', I guess, I better say no to conveyancing for the time being. After all, I am just helping those whom I know with their documentations. The documentations and dealing with banks... trust me... that's the last thing I want in life.
A few lawyers who keep telling me I am doing a right choice to keep the firm small. Well, my principle is this, that, as long as it is not stressing me out and as long as there's money coming in that's enough for me and my future, it's what I call, ENOUGH! So, I don't need to be greedy and rich. I don't have a family or children that I need to take care of. I don't have much burden as my parents are well taken care of. So, I am seriously trying to enjoy life to the fullest....
Just this week, just when everyone is shouting that business is slow due to the election, ... I am rushing works like crazy.... court matters to be filed one by one. Preparing for trials, etc. Apart from that, I am shaking my legs. Trying to get rid of one or two of the clerks that has nothing much to do. :p So, yes.... from a size of 5 staffs, I am down sizing to 3. hehe... cutting cost and expenses. So, who is richer? Do I need to have 'big firm' in order for me to be call "rich"?
- To be or not to be... -
For the second question of why am I not wanting to be bank's penal lawyer? Hmm... good question. Again, it's another that needs lots of efforts and staffs to be around and past year's experiences told me, I can't cope with both side and so, in order to be 'good lawyer' and 'ethical', I guess, I better say no to conveyancing for the time being. After all, I am just helping those whom I know with their documentations. The documentations and dealing with banks... trust me... that's the last thing I want in life.
A few lawyers who keep telling me I am doing a right choice to keep the firm small. Well, my principle is this, that, as long as it is not stressing me out and as long as there's money coming in that's enough for me and my future, it's what I call, ENOUGH! So, I don't need to be greedy and rich. I don't have a family or children that I need to take care of. I don't have much burden as my parents are well taken care of. So, I am seriously trying to enjoy life to the fullest....
Just this week, just when everyone is shouting that business is slow due to the election, ... I am rushing works like crazy.... court matters to be filed one by one. Preparing for trials, etc. Apart from that, I am shaking my legs. Trying to get rid of one or two of the clerks that has nothing much to do. :p So, yes.... from a size of 5 staffs, I am down sizing to 3. hehe... cutting cost and expenses. So, who is richer? Do I need to have 'big firm' in order for me to be call "rich"?
- To be or not to be... -
Tuesday, April 02, 2013
Efforts, lot of efforts.
Knowing that I went through major depression for a while, many who has their friends and family members who's suffering from it came to look for me for advice. All of them asked me the same questions, i.e. (a) Is that mean, it is possible to get it over with? (b) So, it only take 1 year to get well? (c) How did you do it?
My answers exactly, "It's not easy. Many efforts had been put on." I will say, it is extra and extra efforts made. Just like you got up to a horse for the first time, when your instructor asking you to start trotting. You wonder if you can do it. You wonder if your legs will have enough strength, whether you will lose balance and fall down from the horse, etc. etc. etc. But instead of coping 'physically', you are basically asking a depressed person to cope with depression. It's not easy because it attached with your feeling. i.e. you are happy, and you are forcing yourself to be unhappy. Now, that's easier for you to understand, instead of me saying, if you know you are unhappy, you are forcing yourself to be happy. Many people thought it's easy to make yourself happy.... but in a depression scenario, you are not doing that. It's as difficult as when you are happy, you are trying to make yourself unhappy. Yes. extra efforts needed.
I am blessed enough to have my parents. Even with my dad's situation, I think he helped the most. For me to cope, to adjust, to put extra efforts, etc. etc. I am blessed to have managed to moved myself out of my 'comfort' place to go around people I do not know, with or without me liking it or not. I am glad enough to put efforts to take up a phone to call someone when I cannot stand it. I am glad to have a good doctor definitely ... for helping me not to rely on medicine.
I am glad I put enough efforts to make sure I got away and distance myself and cut myself off from things, people and places that caused me depressed - church is the greatest.
I am seriously glad to have relatives from all over the world who gave me tons of advises and supports and not seeing me as someone who is mentally sick.
Oh well, I must say, .... there's lot of efforts being taken. Many which needs a lots of help from people around. I am lucky enough not to have a family, a husband and children that can gave me extra pressures. I can be rich by now, but i choose not to. There's just too many adjustment, decision that forms part of the efforts.
There's just too many times, people who are depressed will just let it be ... doesn't want to come out from it. Because being depressed is much easier than climbing out from it. To snap out from it? It's not hard, it's not even near hard, it's IMPOSSIBLE. I just happen to not bothers about what other says about me and walk around, do works, live a life normally, healthily. If you can't give a helping hands to those depressed people, just walk away and don't bother at all. Because if you don't, with the 'hope' you gave them initially will discourage them later to a point, they will need extra efforts to get back to the same point.
Until today, I still hope one day, those who caused more hardship to me during the most difficult time of my life will experience at least once in their life. I wish them good luck in handling then.
Oh well.................it's over. The nightmare is over... and I will make sure I will not get back to that position anymore.
My answers exactly, "It's not easy. Many efforts had been put on." I will say, it is extra and extra efforts made. Just like you got up to a horse for the first time, when your instructor asking you to start trotting. You wonder if you can do it. You wonder if your legs will have enough strength, whether you will lose balance and fall down from the horse, etc. etc. etc. But instead of coping 'physically', you are basically asking a depressed person to cope with depression. It's not easy because it attached with your feeling. i.e. you are happy, and you are forcing yourself to be unhappy. Now, that's easier for you to understand, instead of me saying, if you know you are unhappy, you are forcing yourself to be happy. Many people thought it's easy to make yourself happy.... but in a depression scenario, you are not doing that. It's as difficult as when you are happy, you are trying to make yourself unhappy. Yes. extra efforts needed.
I am blessed enough to have my parents. Even with my dad's situation, I think he helped the most. For me to cope, to adjust, to put extra efforts, etc. etc. I am blessed to have managed to moved myself out of my 'comfort' place to go around people I do not know, with or without me liking it or not. I am glad enough to put efforts to take up a phone to call someone when I cannot stand it. I am glad to have a good doctor definitely ... for helping me not to rely on medicine.
I am glad I put enough efforts to make sure I got away and distance myself and cut myself off from things, people and places that caused me depressed - church is the greatest.
I am seriously glad to have relatives from all over the world who gave me tons of advises and supports and not seeing me as someone who is mentally sick.
Oh well, I must say, .... there's lot of efforts being taken. Many which needs a lots of help from people around. I am lucky enough not to have a family, a husband and children that can gave me extra pressures. I can be rich by now, but i choose not to. There's just too many adjustment, decision that forms part of the efforts.
There's just too many times, people who are depressed will just let it be ... doesn't want to come out from it. Because being depressed is much easier than climbing out from it. To snap out from it? It's not hard, it's not even near hard, it's IMPOSSIBLE. I just happen to not bothers about what other says about me and walk around, do works, live a life normally, healthily. If you can't give a helping hands to those depressed people, just walk away and don't bother at all. Because if you don't, with the 'hope' you gave them initially will discourage them later to a point, they will need extra efforts to get back to the same point.
Until today, I still hope one day, those who caused more hardship to me during the most difficult time of my life will experience at least once in their life. I wish them good luck in handling then.
Oh well.................it's over. The nightmare is over... and I will make sure I will not get back to that position anymore.
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