Lazy/Tired?

It's a feeling where we feel everyday. Be it lazy to work, lazy to talk, lazy to think, lazy to cook, lazy to wash your clothes or even lazy to eat. I am not sure if I am feeling lazy but I serioulsy feel tired everyday. For some reason, I feel tired these few weeks. I am not sure if it is my work because besides my mind, physically I didn't do much. So, my partner and I think, it could be the paint (very strong smell) that caused us to feel tired, dizzy, lazy and discomfort. My partner called a while ago saying that she is in not feeling well. She still think it is the paint that caused discomfort to us. Anyway... that caused me to stayed at home rather than joining cell group and worship practice for the past 2 days. Oh, to clarify.... I never joined them even once so far due to some complicity. And about cell group, I still haven't find out where and whose cell group to join yet. Well, if you still wondering, there's not many cell group in this church. So, thos of you who has a cell group, consider yourself blessed and join your cell group regularly.

3 people came or interview. One particular one who has 6 years of experiences came yesterday evening and she is one that I think I am going to take as her pay is also lower among the other 2. So, I guess I am calling her up in a while to confirm her a place.

At the same time, I am trying to get businesses. My partner and I visited a few banks yesterday and the respond is consider good. Doing marketing is the last thing I want to do in my whole life because meeting people and talking to people are really not something I like. However, I guess I do need to do that for this initial stage.

Renovation is still going on. My am still not satisfied with my door. I am going to change the door. I am calling people to ask for help o where to get a cheap and nice door. If I am in Tawau, thing like this is just a phone call away. Unfortunately I am in a place where I know NO ONE.

I am finally done with my account. Thank to a good friend who is really helpful and willing to do the full set account for me. Thanks!

For some reason, my "F" key in my notebook keyboard is not working in good order. Goodness... It's still under warranty, but I am not sure if keyboard is included. Ghoosh... I shall check it out now...

Medical Negligence?

Funny...

A friend told me she has a spritual encounter over the weekend. I later found out that she was prayed by someone and was filled by the Holy Spirit, which is good... but things are not over yet and she is still praying hard. So, I joined her in prayer.

I was reading a blog this morning and it was about 'depression'. About mind, about controlling of mind or face the problem of emotions.

I read a few blogs later and realise most of us gone thought this up and down kind of emotions from time to time in our lives. I too, going through the most difficult time. I am left alone after a good 4 weeks of busy accommodating people. I was so bored until I called Astro for subscription.

It only took them 10 minutes to install the whole thing, but the programme won't run until end of today or tomorrow morning. Hence, I took out the smallest law book I have and start reading it again. It's the The law of medical negligence in Malaysia. If you reads law, you probably know what is the Bolam test and so on. I read through that a few months ago and realise there are a bit different between the Malaysia and UK law. Some of you do know that I love this area of law. I do not afraid of suing doctors/hospitals if they are negligent in their practises. So, to catch up a little bit more, I started to read the book I have. Only then I realise I always skip the first chapter which is about the history of medical negligence. I was shock when I get to know that 'medical negligence' started thousand of years back by a group of people: The priest.

This is what I think: The author of the book thought the laying hands and praying for the sick caused medical negligence because the priest in the ancient times is not only those who are preaching the words of God or the one who is familiar with the law, but also physician/doctor.

I was reminded therefore of my friend who told me of what the pastor told her during her prayer last weekend. I am just wondering, could this pastor acted negligently or she really failed to recognised or even deny her own problem? Now, I am really worried...

- medical negligence? -

It is over!!!

After a few weeks of keeping myself busy with church, ministries, meeting people, parents' visit, visiting relatives, cousin's wedding, etc, I am finally left alone in this apartment of mine. haha... I finally had a chance to sleep and rest yesterday evening. It is not that I like to stay alone, but it is always good and refreshing to have my own time doing what I want. I cooked my own favourite food, watched some Hong Kong series while having my dinner and thereafter, called my parents and got myself ready to go to bed. I woke up early this morning, made myself a cup of coffee and went to church. I was alone during the service, but I enjoyed the service very much. I am feeling so tired after a good 3 weeks of continous of works and meeting up people and settling down in this new place.

Of all these, I found that I am a piece of soul that can adapt to a new place or environment very easily. With those sudden decision and sudden move to a new place, I manage to adapt to it in a day or two. It's just amazing. Well, I honestly think that this is beyond my own ability and just because of that, I am certain that, this is where God wants me to be at the moment.

I am still stuck with what ministry to involved myself into. However, this morning something really struck me. That's the course of Master in Theology. I really seriously considering of taking the course.

Just when I thought I will be lonely for the coming days, I received some friends' SMS and emails saying that they are visiting KK next month. It is really nice to have friends to visit me occasionally. Otherwise, I will be too used to a lonely life. hahaha...

Well, I guess God knows my heart and what I want.

Right after church a while later, I went for lunch with a group of youth. They are between Primary 6 to Form 4. I honestly think I am getting older because I had difficulties communicating with them. I think God is funny. He always placed me with those younger or much younger than me. So, when a pastor asked if I would like to help her with children cell, I am really .... ???? hahaha....

"Friends"

The church that I am attending is having a 3 days Revival Meeting. We are all encouraged to attend so I did. On the first evening on 20th day of June, I was a bit late due to some circumstances. I was about 3 minutes late. When I got down from the car, I met 2 familiar persons and I happen to know then that we stayed at the same block. We chat for a while before entering into the church. As they are the 'Pastor', they went in from the front and I walked in the church at the back of the church. I found no one familiar then but I am comfortable enough to sit with some 'strangers' until someone NOT SO FAMILIAR came and sat next to me. I was at the last 6 roll. I look around during the welcoming session and I found no one familiar but the meeting was refreshing and it is short and precise. I enjoyed it.

At the end of the meeting, everyone left and only then I saw many familiar faces. Some of them saw me and came all the way to the back to shook my hand and some, I can't resist but to walk in front to greet them. After a good 5 to 10 minutes shooking hands with so many people, I realise, all my friends are in the Pastoral team. They are either Rev. or Pastors or full time worker. The feeling was so weird.

Yesterday (21.06.2006), I went and met my brother in church and took him out for dinner and shopping. During the dinner, besides asking about my current situation and situation about our parents, etc, he asked who am I familiar with in church. I told him I realise that most of those I am familiar with are Pastors / Rev. and he said, that's not very good. Well, I believe it is not either.

Believe it or not, I was searching for a cell group to attend since the day of my arrival and I have yet to find one. Mainly because I have decided to work in the English congregation and I am a young working adult. I was informed that they do not have many English young working adult cell group. Most of them are senior citizen. However, the chinese team is very eager to get me changed my focus. They said they PRAYED so hard for someone to be able to help them in service (worship team) and also in leading cell group. haha... I guess we all need a little more prayer on all these.

Workwise, goodness... I am stuck with the account. I am really not good in my account. hahaha... So, I am calling two of my great "army" for help.

- friend-

Short "Holiday"!

It was the visit of my dearest parents that caused me to have a good, relaxing, short "holiday" over the weekend. Althought I was not feeling well for a few days ( and still), we had a good 'break'. My parents arrived on Thursday morning and althought I took a few hours off on both Thursday and Friday, but I visited a few friends and relatives and distrbute my business cards. On Friday afternoon, we even visited Papar, one of the small town in Sabah, where my dad was born. I had a wonderful, relaxing break at my uncle's place.

The main purpose of my Parents' visit was to attend my cousin's wedding on Saturday evening. My parents think they should let all my relatives know that I opened a firm in Kota Kinabalu so that they will give me some businesses. On Saturday evening, my dad was the one who introduced me and my firm and ended up, most of my business card are gone.

On Sunway, I had a good, relaxing time with cousins after church service (Father's Day celebration). In the afternoon, my dearest parents said they want to go shopping and what they bought are all for me and my kitchen. haha... anyway, that's my parents. I am always their little daughter.

I sent them off at the airport after breakfast this morning and you can tell how much I miss them.

In Action

It's quite shocking to many when I told them I do not have much experience in Legal Practice but I am opening up my own firm together with a friend. To many people, I guess they rather enjoy the 'working for others' then 'suffering' to look for clients themselves. I was once in that possition either. I am a person who doesn't like to dress up, meet up with people, to do marketing, to promote what I am good at and so on. So, opening up my own firm is really something never cross my mind until last year. I was so busy with everything for the past few weeks and hence, I was not able to upload any of my blog. All I have in mind for the moment is how to get more clients. It is not an easy task. But credit to my partner who is someone really good in marketing.

This week, I am getting the signboards, furnitures, and painting of walls done. On Thursday, my parents will be here to pay me a visit. I hope I won't disappoint them again.

Apart from work and life, I am putting my best in involving in ministries as well. I attended the 1st KK Girls' Brigade Officers meeting last night. Will again take up to be Drill Officer and I have asked for cell group to attend and worship practice to attend.

It is really not easy to leave our comfort zone. I still remember how happy and comfortable I was during my first job as Legal Assistant. I have my own place, my own printer, I have a few clerks to help me and so on. I was being respected and my works were being recognised. But I left it all behind and move on to enter into the Legal Profession. Moving over to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah after leaving Sabah for at least 13 years, it is really not easy. Moreover, I do not know Kota Kinabalu much and that added more sourness in my life.

However, there's one fact that I will not / cannot deny. That my God is BLESSING ME!!!

Yes. Works are coming in. I was so busy until I work almost every single second of my life. Really a lot. I pray for more. So, join me in prayer...

Condition...

It's not easy to allow my brain to rest in the 'comfortable' zone now. I can't even sleep tight every night. Yesterday, I was shock to see my office door's condition. What a poor workmanship and trust me, if I do that with my own hand, I am sure it is better than what it is now. I was so not satisfied with it and I made a complaint to my partner. There and then only that I found out that it's down by my partner's friends. I do not mind if it is cheap and nice, but, it is expensive and not nice. To avoid more argument, I therefore decided to leave this place and go back to Tawau to celebrate Parents' Day with them today. hahahaha....

It's really great to be able to meet some OLD friends during these 2 weeks. Invitation to visit Beaufort and Labuan are always open. So I can ensure you that if you can't find me in KK during your visit, it must be I am too stress and need a break. hahaha...

Office is still not done yet. I hope everything is done by tomorrow and that by next week, it looks like an office.

Oh yes... just in case you ask me where I am now... I can actually access hotspot in my office room. hohohohoho.... what a good news!!!

So, guess this will make my day.....

Miserable II

My weekend was good. At least I saw someone familiar in church and started to involve in ministries. I was so worried about things, i.e. when can our office finished with it's renovation, when can the furnitures move in, when can the door be fixed, when can the phone start operating? When can this and that... !!! On top of that, my partner disappear this morning. Guess she is busy with 3 of her cases on hand and me? still miserably looking out for clients and business. God indeed blessed me with friends who are Estate Agent that promise to pass me files, etc. I am thinking of going back to Tawau to get some files as well.

But, where is my partner this morning? Hmm.... just when I was worried, she called and asked me where I am and what we need to do today. So, I am still stuck in this office neighbourhood, TMPoint to do my Internet access while waiting for the people to get my air con and door lock done.

2 days ago, this new tenant (KL) called and asked if he can pay me part of the deposit this month and he promise he will pay for the rest next month. Well, according to him his situation is severe then mine. I wonder how he came to know and base on what he said that. Do I not need a capital to start my firm? Do I not need money to ship my belonging including my car back to Sabah? And I do not have a single cent from my last month labour. Now, tell me who has the more severe 'situation'? He said he called to discuss but when I suggest he pay me in full, he said he can't. Tell me, I am not even a tenant nor landlord in that house anymore, why do I need to deal with all these? Can I ask him not to move in? My physical body not even in KL... I am personal lives according to rules and this is just INCORRECT!!!!! But yet, I can't do anything about it. .... I am speechless!!!!

Well, I guess this is life. I bet not many gone through life like this and not many can understand what I am going through. So, I guess my only expression is 'HAI!!!!". hahahahahaha....

- speechless -

Miserable!

It has been a while since my last blog. People start wondering what happen to me since the moment I left Kuala Lumpur. Well, let me keep you informed of what happen to me then.

Sunday (28.05.2006) :

I arrived in the evening and right after that, I went to collect my apartment keys and moved in. The place is terrible. Dusty and I almost move to a hotel.

Monday (29.05.2006):

My partner and I suppose to open an account but we ended up doing some other things, i.e. printing name cards, cops and so on. It's terribly jam on that particular day in KK and I was stuck in traffic most of the time. I went to the prayer meeting in the evening.

Tuesday (30.05.2006):

My partner and I went around a few furniture shops and trying to get all furnitures sorted out. I also tried to get mattress and some necessities done.

Wednesday (31.05.2006):

Shops for mattress is still on the way. A friend came down from Mount Kinabalu and stays with me. I consider that as a blessing because she is wonderful. At least she accompanied me and gave me lots of advices. Good.

Thursday (01.06.2006):

Supposingly today is opening of our firm. But the renovation is still going on and everything is unsettled. I am not very happy but I think God since there's nothing much to do, I went around and bought myself a mattress, got myself a TV (really boring without a TV in KK, especially staying alone) and a writing table.

Today (02.06.2006):

The renovation is still on. They are doing works and I am here at TM point to do my emailing and internet searching. A friend called me to let me know that Air Asia ticket to Tawau from Kota Kinabalu is cheap, so i came over and check for the price. Well, it's RM70 difference between Air Asia and MAS.

Dad and Mom are coming over for a cousin's wedding on 15.06.2006 and that's good news as I might want to arrange a tea reception (opening of office) when they are here.

I am secretly going back to Tawau next Thursday. First trying to get business. Secondly, it's Parents' Day on Friday, so I am going back to celebrate with parents. hahaha... ok. don't tell my parents ah... hahaha....!!!

Well, accessing internet is really something NOT possible at my aparatment nor office at the moment. TM told me they need to do a wiring from 7th Floor to ground floor and that will cost me about RM500 itself. Until that is done, I cannot get phone line or internet. At home, I will be miserable because the phone itself take ages to installed. Reason given by TM: HOLIDAY! Erg... anyway....!!!

I went around the whole City wondeirng if there's a place like Starbucks where I can access to internet freely. And I found the whole City is using HOTSPOT. Well, for the 2 days holiday, I can't get access because all the shops ran out of the Start-Up card. Goodness!!! That's KK I believe because I heard even Tawau has at least one Cafe that we can access internet.

So, I really thank God that my friend is here with me. Otherwise, I will be miserable for a few days. Now, my prayer is: the renovation be done A.S.A.P. and of course that I can survive next month. Money is running out ... erg....!!!! Praying, Praying....!!! Friend is asking me where is my faith in the Lord, I am wondering the same myself.

Have mercy on me, oh Lord!!!!