I just realised i am a very self conscious person. I do check on myself regularly. I admit that i am not always right, but at least i try to learn from mistakes. Hence i always give people second or third chance. Because i know and wish to be given second chance too... especially when i know i was wrong. I hates to hurt others with my words and actions. When i knew i did hurts a few when i started to retaliate, i did check on my emotions and behavious. I knew something is wrong with me. I remember telling dad i wasn't reacting as myself, as if i am controlled by some spirit. I did told him what i did, i told a best friend what i did, etc....and dad told me 'it is me that is wtong'. It is very normal for people to expect a friend telling them she is going to die. Everyone scares.' Dad asked me to continue with seeing docotr and seeking help. Of course, knowing that i will be feeling the worse at night about 7pm to 9pm, he usually call around 8pm to just chat. This happen just about the same time last year.
To be honest, i am glad i seek help and get my sickness treated, even though i have to be very cautious and take control of myself even more these days. Yes, i am still very much needed the medicines because besides the medicines, i don't have anything else to help me to stay alive and healthily at the moment, especially these critical moments. Well, at least, i am in control of myself now. Even though the past 1 year wasn't the case.
Unlike some people i know, whom they do know they need help but refuse to admit that they are sick. Some, they do know they are sick, but they refuse to get treatment. Some, they keep telling others they are healed by God and yet still having problem with their emotions. Some, they lied to others and themselves because of pride. All these people, they lives in their own lies.....they are not only suffering, but they also made others suffer. The most ridiculous thing is, they were telling others how to be witness for God. Goodness, if they cannot even do it themselves... in a family, who are they to tell me that taking medicine is not good? At least i am better than them. Until and unless you acts like a wife, a daughter in law and a mom, whom you should be, i won't respect you of who you are,really.... ! Shame on you!!!
- Again?-
To be honest, i am glad i seek help and get my sickness treated, even though i have to be very cautious and take control of myself even more these days. Yes, i am still very much needed the medicines because besides the medicines, i don't have anything else to help me to stay alive and healthily at the moment, especially these critical moments. Well, at least, i am in control of myself now. Even though the past 1 year wasn't the case.
Unlike some people i know, whom they do know they need help but refuse to admit that they are sick. Some, they do know they are sick, but they refuse to get treatment. Some, they keep telling others they are healed by God and yet still having problem with their emotions. Some, they lied to others and themselves because of pride. All these people, they lives in their own lies.....they are not only suffering, but they also made others suffer. The most ridiculous thing is, they were telling others how to be witness for God. Goodness, if they cannot even do it themselves... in a family, who are they to tell me that taking medicine is not good? At least i am better than them. Until and unless you acts like a wife, a daughter in law and a mom, whom you should be, i won't respect you of who you are,really.... ! Shame on you!!!
- Again?-
posted from Bloggeroid
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