Lack of compassion?

Oh well, this happen few hours back where my cousin sister told me about someone passed away in front of another cousin.  She does sound 'solemn'... but unfortunately, i wasn't taking it seriously.  hahaha... to a point, i did answered: "oh, dead is it?".  Then both cousins wanted to laugh and asked me why put it so 'rude'.  I laughed out loud... and explained that "Death means death, what's to solemn and sad about?" and there burst out in laughters.
Is this lack of compassion? I used to feel sad for family members of those who passed away, but ever since I was so near to death before, I don't feel anything to be sad about when it comes to death.  In fact, that's relief.  Anyway, i have learned not to be so 'compassionate'.... anymore. No more such 'stupid feeling'.  Hence, people can now refer divorces cases, and other litigation matters to me.  I don't have a feeling anymore.
I do have someone whom i know being introduced by another lawyer to me.  The lawyer told me I might know them and she doesn't want to accept the case because she knows both of them.  But I never seems to have that problem about handling your friends' divorce.  When I was told the 2 are planning for a divorce, I don't feel a thing, except, "Great, more income this month!". hahahaha....
So, if you ask me what am I focusing these days? REALITY.
I have a lawyer helping me these days.  But unfortunately, she's like whom I was .... and i couldn't stand anymore because of that characters and attitudes.  I demanded her to be more realistic and practical. Be a lawyer who can earn and accumulate profits.  Not stay on 'principles'.  I am sure she is not agreeing with me on this, but who cares? hahahahahaha.....
Lacking of compassion these days? I guess so.  It just makes me easier to survive.
While we were talking about the deceased and her son just now, I was very surprise to know that all my cousins dislike her son.  I was even shocked to know that he walked passed my cousin when he saw her.  I guess it's a fact as to 'whom' side of the story they believe after all, even though I never tell my side of the story. I don't think that's necessary at all. hahaha... time can clarify things.
So, my aunt is the closest to the deceased.  But seems like she's also not bothering much... hmm... what to do? We had a feast this evening. We are still MORE important. hehe...
Am I lack of compassion? I don't think so.  I think I am only being reality.  Treat people the same way they treated me. :)
- Lack of compassion? -