It's the issue of my future that bothers me lately. It was the career opportunity that I stepped foot at this piece of land. However, things changed and direction lost. For a few months, I have been thinking why am I here for. I am not getting pay a monthly salary and I just feel future is insecure and I worried every single day of how I can survive the next moment. I thought it might be good to join a firm as Legal Assistant and with that, at least I will be paid a monthly salary and life should be good then. However, after I had a meeting with 2 of the senior lawyers few weeks back, I seriously not sure if that's a correct move. The very senior lawyer is having problem finding a job somewhere else as she is very experienced and her pay is high. For her, the only solution is to open her own firm if she wants to get out from her present firm. The monthy pay won't be increasing after it reaches 5K to 6K unless you open your own firm and get businesses in. That's the reality. So, for me to get back to become Legal Assistant, I wonder if things will be the same after a few years later. i.e. I have to come out and start my own firm.
I can't see the point of all these. Yes. I lost the direction. If I start a firm, it's a long term committment. It won't be easy. I will have to 'fight' for things all by myself. I suddenly feel that I will be 'tired' 'fighting' alone. There's no meaning at all. What's the ultimate goal of all? Not that I enjoy my life so much as a lawyer. May be I should start looking for something else to do. May be my initial plan was good. To open a bookshop and having a small law firm next to it. hahaha...
I am seriously bothered... may be it all started with not having a stable income every month?
- thoughts -
4 comments:
Hmm...can understand how you feel...sometimes the road ahead of us is so shrouded in mist that it feels like we've completely lost our sense of directions, not knowing where to go...However, it is often at times like this that God puts us in waiting until the very last moment, before He would clear the mist for us. For this is the time when He wants us to seek Him and to rely on Him...to listen to His voice. If we were always certain of our directions in life, then there would be times when we may forget the Real meaning of "...Absolute reliance and dependence on the One who provides us with All things..." Sometimes, you don't need to know where you're going if you know the One who does...As humans we are unable to control Everything that is thrown across our faces in life, yet always and anon God is in control of All things...Continue to seek His guidance in this...Will keep you in prayers...Take good care of yourself. God bless you always...
~A. Mikhaila~
if a bookshop cum law firm it will be, I'd be the first to submit my application for assistant & secretary =p
-guess who-
Take heart Pei San,
God will make a way, where there seems to be no way. :)
No need to submit application lah... hahahah...
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