Weird...

Though we only have 4 persons (including me) attended cell last night but it was the greatest meeting we ever had for the year. We had lots of laughters, sharing, etc.etc. I have decided to sing some praise and worship that's not so familiar to them as I am seriously frustrated by singing the same old one again and again for a year. I couldn't stand it when thing is not changed for any better or good. How can that helped one to praise and worship the Lord? People are too familiar with the wording and that they started to take it to granted. People will start singing for the sake of singing and not praising and worshiping. Well... speaking of praise and worship, may be I should write something about it soon. I just hate it when I saw the musician and those who are 'singing' are just doing it because they have the skills. They do not even know and understand what they should do and what they are doing. It's saddening. When I recalled on similar incident years ago in my home town church, I remember that we only have a few whose heart were not right when it came to this ministries and immediately, we asked him to stop serving in this ministry until he/she has the right attitudes and heart and know the reason why he/she is in this ministry. I really wish that we do the same here. I would rather to have only 1 person serving in the team whose heart is right then a group of 8 and none has the right heart. God will not like or accept the music we presented to Him if we do not have a right heart. Most of us has the skills but skills is not what God is looking at. It's the 'sacrifies' and 'offering' that He is looking at.

So... I have difficulties grouping with people who doesn't have a right heart in serving God in this ministry. It's like I wanted to cross the boundaries to reach God but these people are preventing me from being there. Even if I am not serving in the ministry on Sunday, I just found it hard... it's like the music is not helping us come nearer to the Lord and praising Him or worshipping Him. Conclusion, the group has failed terribly in SERVING God and His people in this ministry.

Some thought playing a musical instruments and the skills they have is good enough.. but they have failed even to go beyond their current level of skills. They thought they are the best. They play the same pattent on every songs. They have failed to be in the presence of God and/or feel God when they play. None of them who is standing on the stage on Sunday is singing or following the Order of the service. When the church pray, they just stand there. When the church sings, they also stand there playing with their musical instruments. It's a pain to see such failure to praise and worship.

Some people gets closer to God when they are not serving by playing, but some do gets closer to God when we gets to serve Him in our playing. That's what I call, we use instruments to praise and worship Him. I consider the former one to be a failure in praising and worship God and the purpose of serving in the team is therefore not served.

The team suppose to be an encouraging to those who are not on stage, but at the end of the day, I do not know if this purpose is served. For the mature christian, we can praise and worship the Lord anyhow, but for the new christian, I am really not sure if they manage to be encouraged.

I really hope that the team would be strong spiritually in order to be part of the team to bring people into the holy of holy. I noted that many in the team has not strong spiritually and when they are not, how are we going to bring others into the holy and holy? It's saddening everytime when I think of it and everytime when I share on this. However, people are still being stubborn and didn't even want to take any steps in improving this current situation.

- weird & sad -