Conflict Style Description

I was thought of these few conflict style description during a few hours of seminar by John Ng during the Eagle Leadership Conference. I must tell you, I had a dilemma when during the whole conference as I was asked to think of someone whom I always have conflicts with and than, focus on the issues and try to resolve the conflict arounds it. Oh well, when I was asked to pair with a pastor and talked about it (we knew each other), I ended up having problem finding that 'someone'. Not that I don't have, .... just that... well, you will see when I put on the conflict style description as stated below (I will explain mine in a while): -

(a) Constant Naggings

(b) Harsh Start-ups

(c) Criticism

(d) Contempt

(e) Defensiveness

(f) Stonewalling

(g) One Leg Kicking (the subject falling into the same pattern of behaviour and using the same style in dealing with the conflicts that arise with the other party).

(h) Failure in Repair and Failure to Repair

(i) Smiling Tiger; Hidden Dragon (the subject behaving as if everything is okay towards the conflicting party even though the subject is still angry. The subject also acts as if things are fine in the presence of external parties such as friends and relatives, as he/she does not want external parties to know about his/her problems, even though much resentment and anger still resides in the subject's heart.

(j) Confession Approach

(k) Physical Violence

(l) More Negativity than Positivity

After we were told of these styles, we were all given a test. This it he most difficult test ever because I couldn't think of anyone and so, a person came into mind and I did the test based on this person.

The test shown that, I have always used this conflict styles: Stonewalling and Smiling Tiger, Hidden Dragon.

Yes, in any and every conflicts situation, these styles seems to came in and either you will see me smile and pretend I don't feel anytihng or you will see me listening without any action and let the other party to finish it and leave. But I must remind you, that as it is described, you will add on hurts and angers in me ... and as a human being, it will burst one day!

Ya... if you are about to or planned to have a conflict with me in near future, bear in mind this, that I might 'assess' you based on what I learn at Eagle Leadership Conference. hahahaha... see, I am taking conflict as 'fun' too... isn't that cool?

- Conflict Style Description -