Job!!!

It was yesterday (15.02.2006) that a firm called me and told me that they are offering me a place. It is a small litigation firm. They (2 partners) seems nice and they seems to know two of the firms that I used to practice at. Guess they do have confidence in me either. Which is a good sign. I have told them I am accepting their offer yesterday (15.02.2006) and am going to the office to sign my letter of offer tomorrow (17.02.2006). I hope nothing goes wrong here. It is only a few days without a job but that's enough to made me feel 'crazy'!!!

What happen last week still stay real and fresh in my mind. I wasn't really sure why and how it all happen now, but I just knew in split seconds that, if i am not getting out of there, I will surely suffer a lot from that place and I will learn even more unethical things compare to my firm in Tawau. I am not sure where all the courage came from then, but it is over. I still remember how much fear I had the day before things happen. I called my parents and talked to my dad about the issue. The next day, I met a friend that really saved my life and I told my dad and he said, it must be sent my GOD because they have been praying hard for me on this. I really need to thank my parents and all my good friends who was with me during the whole week and to advice me and to guide me through. My previous litigation partner during my chambering in KL even helped me to call up the Bar Council and Disciplinary Board to check things out and to confirmed with me that my decision to leave was indeed correct. He even jokingly said it's an interesting and good experience. hahaha... Anyway, as a christian senior lawyer (13 years of experience), he really gave me a good spiritual and law professions guidances. I thank God for a good friend and boss like him.

Now that I got a job, I am not thinking of going back to Tawau at the moment, although I miss home so much. Can't stop thinking about my parents. But I also reminding myself to develop myself well as a lawyer in KL while I can.

I went down to KL to fetch my uncle, aunty, cousin and his girlfriend yesterday to meet my brother and his family for dinner. While we were in the car, my uncle were shock to find that my pay is so little. He asked me to go back to Tawau and start a firm. I said that's my plan also, but I need to be a good lawyer before I go back because everyone know who I am and their expectation to me is higher than any other new lawyer. I don't want that kind of pressure at this moment. In a way, they agreed with me. Later, they blessed me with a gift and some money (not a lot, but... it is indeed a blessing). After talking to my uncle on this, I think finally he knows why I am in KL although the pay is very little compare to Tawau. But, he did widen up my mind and eyesights about prospect in Tawau also. I am really blessed of havin this uncle and his family. He has been blessing me a lot.. at least, my degree!!! Thank you, uncle!!!

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Jobless week + Birthday!!!

Well, log on and noticed that I didn't post anything for a few days. Partly it is because I do not have mood and partly because my computer was down. I ended up re-format the whole notebook yesterday evening and now, it's back to use.

I was called for an interview yesterday morning (13.02.2006), today (14.02.2006) and there's one tomorrow (15.02.2006). Hmm.. friends reminded me that, my situation is not bad at all compare to some of my friends who has been jobless for months. Well, I am not someone who can sit still at home doing nothing kind of person. In additional to that, I am so eager to learn more now. All these, just put me off a bit and de-motivate me in a way. ... Of all these years, there's not a single day which I did not work or study. I was always in the move. Suddenly I was told I do not have a job (work/studies), it really got out of my hand and mind. But yes, I shall treat this as my ONLY holiday and also time to clean up my room and so on.

Today (14.02.2006) is my birthday. I met up a friend in KL for lunch because I need to collect some important documents from my previous firm and also to get a present from my friend (she requested me to meet her for the present). Thereafter, I came back home and starated to sort out things with my notebook, then rested for a while and suppose to meet a friend for dinner. But ended up, I was at police station together with her and her housmates (my friends). Their house was broken in and many important documents and cash were stolen. I was the second one to enter the crime scene and it's so dramatic... anyway, after the police station, then 3 of us went for a good, fulfilling and delicious dinner. I enjoyed it very much... !!!

When I came back, one of my housemate came down, sang me a birthday song and gave me a slice of cake. I felt so warm and blessed after all!

It is not easy to remain happy while I am jobless and seems to lost my focus and motivation towards this profession, but... what I gained from all these is to know who created happiness for me and I actually get closer to Him these few days. I think He really treasure me as who I am and that, he used many ways just to show me how much He cares about me and how much He want me to go back to the 'on fire' Pei San. So, I am taking this week off. To get closer to Him!!!

Resigned @ Jobless!!!

Hmm... I believe this is not something you expect to read in my blog since I sounds really happy about the firm for the past few days. However, I must said, I was a bit unhappy because of one single issue since day 2. I was asked to do some illegal works. Although I manage to ask someone to help me with it, but I was really not happy of doing it. I voiced my discomfort to one of the junior partner twice but he doesn't really want to listen to it and he ignored me all together. Yesterday, I felt so depress over this issue and I again voiced out my discomfort and dissatisfacton to the junior partner but he ignored me either. I hence planned to speak to the senior partner. But before I did that, the junior partner found out that I refuse to do what he and the senior partner were asking me to do. So, I was called to the senior partner's room. The senior partner (she) asked me the reason of my refusal. It is simple and she should have known it, that's I do not have the locus to do it. If I did and being caught, I will be liable myself and the worse consequences is that, I might not be able to practice anymore. I am still young in the professions and I am not ready to take all the risk. Well, she said she done that before and she claim that, she's from "S" firm ( one of the top 3 in Malaysia) and she did the same during her time. Well, I am not sure how she made it out that she did it before and was not caught and that = the RIGHTS to do it. She is senior enough to challenge the law stated in the Legal Professions Act 1976, but i am not. If anything goes wrong, I will be liable, she will not... So, I am really wondering what rights does she has to said what she told me this afternoon. Anyway, to cut the story short, she gave me 2 choices. One is to go to court as per her instruction and the other, to resign. Well, I guess what really made me not comfortable was that when she said, I should have just listen to what her instruction is and follow and not challenge her. Hmm, .. that's mean, in future, if she asked me to do corruption, I have to do too. ... when I think of this point, I started to feel insecure and I have chosen option 2.

I am not sure if all these are my problem because to some, I should have just close one eye and do it for her. As long as I know how to cover my wrongdoing, i will be fine. But I do thank all my friends who are in this professions that gave me assurance that I am correct in doing so because she shouldn't have FORCE me to do it for her. I know I might be getting same kind of bosses in future, in another firm, but... I am telling myself, am I trying to please man or God here. I am asking myself these couple of days "What Will JESUS do?" . And I guess, ... God doesn't want me to do illegal works loh.

I do need a job desperately but not to the extent I do illegal works and lives. ...

I am really worry about my future and my career. I want a permanent job. I am so depress now. Hence, If you are nice, please say a little prayer for me, ok? I need a job. IMMEDIATELY!!!

- depress -