What a day...

Well, it's Friday again... and I thought in my mind that today is Saturday. Guess I really looking forwards to the weekend. But came to think about it, I don't really have any special plan for the coming weekend. Except... may be to get a phone for my mom. haha....

Let me tell you what happen yesterday morning. My usual practice for every morning is to read the newspaper before breakfast. So, when I got up yesterday, I read the newspaper as usual and when I was turning to the last page, I saw a notice... and when I continue to read, Ghoosh...I found that I know the deceased... It's my friend's mother who passed away on the day before yesterday. OH NO!!!!! I can not believe my eyes because I saw the deceased and met up with her 2 to 3 months before I came back to Tawau. I still remember how happy she was when she saw me and my friend months ago. She has not seen me for quite a numbers of years, say about 8 years and me and my friend were decided then to visit her at her place after we 'yam cha' with her daughter. We chatted, we smiled, we updated each others, etc... But suddenly, I saw the notice on the newspaper and I was really shocked. ... well, I called my friend in KL, asked if she is alright. Ghoosh.........funeral is today... 10am... I can't be there... !!! But she will be in my prayer. - SAD-

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This morning, woke up late but dad and mom already prepared some nice breakfast on table for me. Foods that's only Tawau has. hahaha.... Came to office and when I arrived, my boss told me he got free tickets from Airaisa last night, easily. Wow... that's struck my mind to call Airasia to confirm my booking/buying. So, as soon as I switched on my PC, I called Airasia... and I holded the line for exactly 15 minutes. A guy with a sleepy tone picked up my call and confirmed my booking for me. HOW WONDERFUL!!!! Though the process was really annoying, but at the end, I succeeded. hohohohoho... !!! Yup... I got 2 tickest for my parents for FREE... hahahahahahahahaha....!!!! - HAPPY-

Hmm... but.....since then, I am so free... and started to feel a bit bored. Wonder in my mind, what I should I do for the rest of my day in the office. I guess I am going to read some Rules... so that I get them store up in my mind forever. hahaha...

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Ghoosh............I tried to work out with some budget for next year and after much calculation, I found that I might really need to try to get into a big firm to be able to survive. goodness...!! Now, I am really wondering if one of this 2 firms that's in my mind would want me...... No matter how, I shall try. ...

OH NO... you are not going to believe this... if nothing goes wrong, I will be called to the Sabah Bar on 13.01.2006. Hmm... my mom won't be around, not sure if dad will want to join me in KK and also take the honour to robe me.... anyway... that makes my application and plan more complicated. Anyway, I should pray harder and harder and harder..........

<2 days>

Oh NO!!!! I missed yesterday's opportunity to publish something on this blog. Erg... must be too busy with something. Well... let me tell you what happen yesterday...

In the early morning, I came in office thinking I will be very free today as I cleared my work assigned to me the day before yesterday. I was having my peaceful morning until 11am, where my boss called me in and passed a file to me. It's RESEARCH!!! God knows how much I love research... my boss gave me the research and asked me to visit the Court Libruary to get some information. Well, my leg refused..... hahaha.. and ops... my boss is in the court libruary now... hahahaha... Well, not that I didn't do anything. I searched the online engines and now I have about 20 cases to read. OK.. just when the clock turn 12pm, I heard a loud alarm sounded outside the office. I rushed out after my colleague said there's a car crashed to the road blocker and hit the car opposite. Smoke came out from the car, a girl was trying to open the car door and she couldn't. The car locked inside and out. She was in despair... Among 20 + people surrounding the car, one person rushed to his shop nearby, brought out a metal and broke one of the window of the car, open the doors and people start trying to get the driver out. Not long after that, an ambulance came by and rushed the driver to the hospital. Just when I was watching this dramatic circumstances, a friend from KL texted me... telling me that, Air Asia is giving out 200,000 free seats and suggested that I should check that out. Without hesitation, I did and ... I have been trying to log in since then ... but yes... guess the web is sort of congested at the moment... so... still trying.. still trying...!!!

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Right after lunch, I was talking to my parents and I really hate it when they raise the issue of me, not being RICH after a long fight. I hate it because they are not supportive with me going into pupillege and what I am doing. Hmm... as if I don't really want to be rich now. I suffer every moment all these while also. Can't they understand that? I think that's the main reason why didn't I try to discuss my future with them anymore. Yes. I didn't tell them about the offer my current boss is offering for me. And I didn't also tell them my plan of going back to KL to join other firms and not my ex-boss's firm, etc, etc. I think I am just tired talking to them, since they are not being understanding and pressurising. ... well...............that reminded me on what I want to walk away from home 10 years ago. ...

I thought after a long while, I would miss my family and I will be closer to them. But.. NO.. I was wrong. I shouldn't expect so much......it's just so disappointed. Hai... well? .. i am just an alien in this family. ... ghoosh!!! I hate those feeling... I can't deny that they do love me... but I just don't like the 'discourage' and 'disappointed' feelings that they unintentionally transferred it to me... if you know what I mean... well...........although I love them... but I think, to maintain that, living together is not a good idea... I feel that I am closer to them when I stay apart from them... really!!!

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Money....

Sensitive issue all the time. ... I was thinking to join my ex-boss's firm, getting a fix amount of money and spend most of my time serving the Lord, etc... But when I come to think of the issue of money ... I think I better re-consider of going into a "better" firm...

A friend reminded me that it is not easy to be a Godly lawyer and that... has really reminded me of what's the most important thing of my life. I always thought that money is not as important as God and I should serve Him first ... But what I am getting now a day just lead me to change my preceptions on this matter. I am asking myself, shall I just go and work in this law firm that I might cause me to work on Sunday? Didn't I fight not to attend Brickfield because I didn't want to sacrifice my Sunday with the Lord? And after such a fight.. what did I get? Disappointment ... discourages... etc, etc. hai... yes, indeed, it's really not easy to be a Godly lawyer. It's really like asking for "ABC panas".

I really don't like all these feelings...........

- upset, discouraged, disappointed -

"My Father's Business"!!!

I was in the discussion with a friend about "my Father's business" about a week ago. And that, has made me conclude that, as a lawyer, I might not be in the position of helping with my "Father's business". Allow me to put it this way. My dad and my brother are priest. They are wearing a white robe while I am wearing a black one. They got people married and I got them divorced. ... Oh NO!!!!

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It was this thought of what a Christian lawyer's status is in this society that bother me since the beginning my career. Just when I was decided to leave all my 'good life' behind me and enter into the legal professions, a good friend of mine gave me a Christmas present, "Live your passion, tell your story, change your world" by Rob Reccord and Randy Singer.

I still remember, it was the first day of my work in this law firm just opposite KLCC. I started my day by reading the frist chapter of the book, there, I came across this passage call: ON MISSION: Called to make a different. In it, it reminded me that the Great Commission is not issue just for Pastor, Priest and full time workers, but also to everyone. Hence, the POWER is universally available and the CALL is universally applicable.

I would like to quote the 8 principles for fulfilling your life's calling in this book for you this morning to encourage you and myself:

1. God has been PREPARING a UNIQUE PLAN and calling for your life since before you were born.

2. God calls you to a LIFE-CHANGING relationship with Him through Jesus Christ.

3. God calls you to PARTNER WITH HIM in a life-changing mission that is bigger than you are.

4. God repeatedly will bring you to CROSSROADS OF CHOICE as He forges and equips you for His mission.

5. God calls you to be ON MISSION with Him RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE - starting now.

6. God reveals His mission through His word, His Spirit, wise counsel, and His work in CIRCUMSTANCES AROUND YOU.

7. God guides you and provides for you to carry out your mission ON STEP AT A TIME.

8. When you answer God's call and fulfill His mission, you will experience His pleasure and inevitably CHANGE YOUR WORLD.

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2 nights ago, as most of my books are not with me (they are all in KL), I took the book up and read it again before I sleep ( after a while, this is the only book left). Again, I came across this passage and it reminded me that, althought I am not a Pastor, or a Priest or a full time worker in the church nor wearing a white robe, but God choose me to be a lawyer, a christian lawyer which I believe, to fulfil the plan He has for me and to this society.

I have already went through many crossroads of choices and I believe, He has equipping me for His greater missions in future. Hence, I am bearing in mind this 8 principles for fulfilling my life's calling as a christian lawyer.

How about you?