Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Confirmation
I have many who recently told me I am not as 'godly' as I claimed myself as. hahahahahahahaha.... I am not surprise. I am smarter each day. I am not as stupid as before. No one shall take me for granted anymore. hehehehe.....
Faithful to the end?
It's either a plan, or co-incident that I was in KK on the 14th July 2014 weekend. After not being in KK during weekend for few months, I seriously was quite happy to know that I won't be alone that weekend. It's Michelle Kong's wedding and Charleen will be around and we have planned for a meet up after the wedding before I send her to the Bishop's house to visit Bishop Albert. It was Saturday morning that we all met in church and even though I was not being invited for her wedding dinner in KK, i think it's good to attend her wedding ceremony (since I missed the Tawau dinner).
During the wedding (while they were doing the signing), Mrs Vun told Charleen and her family that meeting in the afternoon might need to be cancel as Bishop wasn't well and might need to be admitted to pump in some nutrition. We therefore hanged around October cafe while waiting for Melissa at Shangrila Tanjung Aru.
While we were in October cafe, Mrs Vun and Sarah sent Charleen text messages informing her that they are sending Bishop to hospital. Prior to that, i did heard that he has not been well. Due to the messages, I have decided to attend 10am service as I know Bishop insisted to preach that sunday.
He preached a passing with all his breath to just to tell us, we need to stay on the course no matter how difficult it will be in the future.
I heard the message twice and that reminded me what he used to told me when i was in full time ministry. I am never his favourite because I don't purposely try to please him. I was sitting at the House of Prayer last saturday, and i remember the day before I left Tawau to England, Kevin (full time worker then), brought me in the site to have a look of the structure of the House of Prayer. I wasn't around during the opening, nor I was around during the first few years. I only remember i asked my dad to pay RM200 on my behalf. Those day, everyone was encouraged to pay RM200.00 for a chair in the House of Prayer. I still remember there's thief who came in to the site sometimes, and Bishop Albert will bring his torchlight to go chase the thief.
When I was a full time worker, he used to ask me to clean the carpet in the office, wash the toilet to a point someone is willing to put their head inside, do this and that. Getting scolded is a definite thing. Remember one of the staff retreat in Semporna, Johnny, Anthony and I together with Pastor Margaret went off from the resorts during meditation time and of course we get scolded. Well, 3 of us are still the naughty one until today. hahahaha....
For Christ Church 40 years old celebration, together with Caroline, i made an appointment with bishop through his secretary. Appointment got mixed up and he scolded me when he saw me. He wasn't scolded me for being late or made him wait for an hour. He scolded me for not emailing him directly. Caroline was shocked when he started scolding , while I start smiling and apologising until he laugh and pat me on my shoulder.
By looking at him for the last time, i just have remember the last confrontation (through emails) I had with him. I understand his stand. I understand his heart. I was confronting because I know it's not his fault, but his subordinate, who has not told him the truth of an incident where I was around and he only relied on report from his subordinate.
He has really done a lot for the church. To a point obviously, the satan is not happy about. God released him from all these at the end. IT's definitely not satan who has won. It's just the beginning of the defeat of satan. That, i am very sure. I am seriously excited to see how satan lose. I hope I have the time to see them lose. It might take a long time for that to happen. But it will happen and I am still praying for the church today. I thank God I am not serving human but God. Many feel sad for his demise, but I am anticipating for a new beginning - the defeat of the satan.
All i need to do now is to be faithful to the end, as encouraged by Him. Are you joining me?
- Faithful to the end? -
During the wedding (while they were doing the signing), Mrs Vun told Charleen and her family that meeting in the afternoon might need to be cancel as Bishop wasn't well and might need to be admitted to pump in some nutrition. We therefore hanged around October cafe while waiting for Melissa at Shangrila Tanjung Aru.
While we were in October cafe, Mrs Vun and Sarah sent Charleen text messages informing her that they are sending Bishop to hospital. Prior to that, i did heard that he has not been well. Due to the messages, I have decided to attend 10am service as I know Bishop insisted to preach that sunday.
He preached a passing with all his breath to just to tell us, we need to stay on the course no matter how difficult it will be in the future.
I heard the message twice and that reminded me what he used to told me when i was in full time ministry. I am never his favourite because I don't purposely try to please him. I was sitting at the House of Prayer last saturday, and i remember the day before I left Tawau to England, Kevin (full time worker then), brought me in the site to have a look of the structure of the House of Prayer. I wasn't around during the opening, nor I was around during the first few years. I only remember i asked my dad to pay RM200 on my behalf. Those day, everyone was encouraged to pay RM200.00 for a chair in the House of Prayer. I still remember there's thief who came in to the site sometimes, and Bishop Albert will bring his torchlight to go chase the thief.
When I was a full time worker, he used to ask me to clean the carpet in the office, wash the toilet to a point someone is willing to put their head inside, do this and that. Getting scolded is a definite thing. Remember one of the staff retreat in Semporna, Johnny, Anthony and I together with Pastor Margaret went off from the resorts during meditation time and of course we get scolded. Well, 3 of us are still the naughty one until today. hahahaha....
For Christ Church 40 years old celebration, together with Caroline, i made an appointment with bishop through his secretary. Appointment got mixed up and he scolded me when he saw me. He wasn't scolded me for being late or made him wait for an hour. He scolded me for not emailing him directly. Caroline was shocked when he started scolding , while I start smiling and apologising until he laugh and pat me on my shoulder.
By looking at him for the last time, i just have remember the last confrontation (through emails) I had with him. I understand his stand. I understand his heart. I was confronting because I know it's not his fault, but his subordinate, who has not told him the truth of an incident where I was around and he only relied on report from his subordinate.
He has really done a lot for the church. To a point obviously, the satan is not happy about. God released him from all these at the end. IT's definitely not satan who has won. It's just the beginning of the defeat of satan. That, i am very sure. I am seriously excited to see how satan lose. I hope I have the time to see them lose. It might take a long time for that to happen. But it will happen and I am still praying for the church today. I thank God I am not serving human but God. Many feel sad for his demise, but I am anticipating for a new beginning - the defeat of the satan.
All i need to do now is to be faithful to the end, as encouraged by Him. Are you joining me?
- Faithful to the end? -
Friday, July 11, 2014
Forgotten...
These few years it has been crazily different. After all that had happen, I forgot, sort of... Who I was .... exactly. Recently, I met many old friends...... Whom I have lost touch for years. Some I cannot even remember their names and faces, but all of them are telling me I had contributed to their success. Just like those who had touched my life when I was young, I somehow had done the same during my youth time. I forgot I wasn't leading a group or two of youth.... It was the whole youth fellowship consisted about 150-200 youth, while all the other leaders were oversea, further their studies. I was training the leaders of all sorts.... . Today, the new leaders might not remember who I am. But those I impacted remembers......
Even one or two of my secondary schoolmates testified today what I have done that made them believe in Jesus. I forgot I was born, trained and chosen as His servant.
The question is, am I still ? The recent trend now is that you have to be a full time workers in order for you to serve The Lord as a leader... Which is totally different from those days where whoever is willing, God needs you.... Even though many whom I have trained is now priest and pastors.... But many also have not serving now because they were being 'rejected' by the church.... I am of course, one of them. It is somehow, Very demoralising and discouraging....
The dilemma is that, due to being rejected, we put all our efforts and energies on our works and most of us succeeded in our career..... And then, the church leaders are labelling us as we are spending more time elsewhere and not God. Such accusation to me, is irresponsible and very selfish.
If we having learned of the weaknesses in church and we voiced out, we were said, we are too earthly too. The church these days..... To me is full of hypocrites than servant of God. They claim they are the ONLY one who knows the heart of God.... And we, who are not as 'great leader' as them, has little God exist in our life.
Seriously, that's exactly why I forgot the meaning of being God's servant. I guess, I just do not want to be equally yorks with this bunch of leaders....
- forgotten -
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