Ambition

A friend holds a very high post in her organisation and is one of the significant people in her organisation, and I can feel that she is contented with her achievement, but she always tells me that she wishes she can achieve more and better.  

A few of my friends have been a consultant in the medical fields and not only that they are specialist, but also consulting specialists, and one is also a professor at the university.  A friend is a professor who heads a department at a well-known university in the UK, overseeing the whole department.  Most of my coursemates who graduated with me are now the Senior legal manager of some very big and well-known companies across the globe.  Every time I speak with them, I feel significantly small and useless.  Well, at least that's what the world definition is if we measure our success by our achievement.  To some even being able to get married and have children is part of the definition of success.  

It is probably how the world or rather the majority of people in this world measure success and how life is to be lived in this world.  Being the minority, we can sometimes feel that we are different and not being accepted by others.  Every single human being somehow tried their very best to earn acceptance and respect from others, and somehow, by their own definition, their recognition seems to be measured by popularity and therefore, by all means, human has tried their very best, by using all sorts of methods, trying to gain popularity so they can be recognised and defined as 'successful'.  

I am not trying to mock the success of those who really have put their sweat and blood to earn it from others because I do not have any.  I respect and recognised the sacrifices made by many people in achieving milestones after milestones in their life and be recognised and successful in their lives.  

What I want to say today is that how I wish we all put the same amount of efforts, sweat and blood trying to achieve the recognition and achievement that is defined in God's definition.  In my humble opinion, trying to proves our intelligent with others, trying to argue the thesis and win the approval of man, trying to be the top student or the top employee or the best or richest companies in the world and trying to have the perfect family, and being the richest in the world, but has failed to get approval and recognition by God is futile in achieving the best success in life.  

I am not here to judge others or even myself.  I am here to remind myself that, no matter how much I want to achieve things and how ambitious I can be, but it is not His will, even if I achieved it, it is by my own efforts, that will means it is not in accordance with His will and approval.  I am not a very ambitious person.  In the past years, people asked what I want to achieve, I can tell you, my answer is always, "I just want to walk everyday like my last but everyday to be used by God in His will".  I am not ambitious to be famous or rich. I just want to live a life that I do not have to worry about tomorrow because I know that my life is in His hand.  It hasn't been an easy journey to just trust in Him and let Him guide me through everyday, but over the past 10 years since I took over the firm, God has not in a single month did not provide me and those working with me sufficient fund to survives.  Even during this year, God has provided more than sufficient for us.  

What do I want to achieve in the coming years? I wish He can tell me so I can prepare earlier.  Well, I guess I just need to take my step of faith step by step and see what He installed for me to walk through. 

The famous and richness are not for me.  Those, I am very sure that will not satisfy my soul.  This year, I am well reminded that spending time with Him like Martha, is the only way that my soul be satisfied.  May my desire to know Him and to continue to be close to Him remain forever and ever. That's my only ambition. 

- Ambition -